Great Idea #13: Ringing Locater Device

I don't know about you, but I am constantly looking for my keys/ wallet/ sunglasses before I can leave the house (although, strangely, I always know exactly where my boyfriend's things are... just not my own). The only thing I don't have trouble locating is my mobile phone- and that's because I just grab the land line and call my mobile, then follow the ringing.

So why don't we have ring tones for other essential and easily lost items? You could purchase an electronic tab which incorporates a phone number. The phone number doesn't connect to a phone as such, just a ringing device which can be attached to your easily lost items. When you ring the number, the device rings so you can follow the sound to your frequently misplaced things.

Of course, you'd need to identify in advance which things you lose frequently- for me that is as above; keys, wallet and glasses. I also frequently lose my car in large car parks, but that can be rectified by me saving up and buying a new car with an auto lock device on the keys. One which makes the car say "beep beep". Similar theory, just a little more expensive. And rendered completely useless if I can't even find my keys...

Great Idea #12: The Distance Estimator

In theory, I know I need to leave extra time for travel during peak hour. In planning, I tend to allow at least fifteen- thirty minutes extra. In practice, I leave only five- fifteen minutes early (despite good intentions) and arrive five- fifteen minutes late.

This experience is usually exaggerated if I am travelling to an area I don't know well, and have to estimate the travel time using my street directory.

Would it really be so tough to set up a travel estimator? The information could be like shareware- you enter your origin, destination and start and arrival times into a database. The information is collated and averaged. You could then search the database by stating your origin, destination and start time. The database could let you know the average travel time to this area at this time of day.

Genius. Someone invent this for me, please. My punctuality depends upon it.

Great idea #11: The Teleporter-Car

Ok, I know that realistically this is a long way off. But let me explain the need for this.

Do you know anyone who, when planned arrival at events, forgets to factor in travel time? My brother is a prime suspect for this; if he needs to be somewhere at, say, 4pm, then he gets in the car at 4pm. Maybe even 5 past 4. He says it's because he's so used to having to catch public transport, that having a car seems impossibly fast. This means he treats the car almost as if it were a teleporter. And so they should be.

If cars were teleporters, we wouldn't need the traffic report. We wouldn't need to worry about peak hour. We wouldn't have to worry about speed cameras, drink driving (teleporting), taxi costs. We also wouldn't have to learn how to drive manual teleporters like we do manual cars. It'd make things so much easier.

So go on. Someone who understands quantum physics; invent this.

P.S. I am aware that, really, the teleporter need to actually be a car. But hey, it's a cool image.

Great Idea #10: Swimwear for the Masses

As previously noted, I am a kinda busty girl. This poses real problems when buying swimwear. WHY do swimwear designers seem to presume that the only people who wear bikinis are skinny teenagers in B cups? It is SO frustrating. Guess what- I want to look good when I go swimming too.

I don't really get how you can find the exact same bra in twenty different sizes, but that swimwear is almost always a universal cup size. News flash- a large breast squished into a tiny fabric triangle is NOT attractive. Or comfortable.

Another news flash- big puppies need a shelf to sit on. If I CAN find a top which covers my twins, they tend to, well, flop. I actually wasn't planning on wearing them around my knees just yet, thanks. Underwire is a big girl's friend.

I'm not the only one having problems here. I know plenty of more petite chested women who can't find bikini tops to suit them either. They find there is too ample breast space for them.

Should a swimwear designer design a basic hot bikini, and then offer it in different cup sizes (perhaps with slightly tweaked designs to best flatter different sizes), they would make a FORTUNE! They've already had the genius ideas of providing a range of different bikini bottoms (tie up side, hipsters, boy leg shorts, etc); and of selling tops and bottoms as separates, so that the consumer can advocate their bikini combo of choice. Now, Swim Wear Gods, it is time to take that idea to the extent of its potential. Please...

Great Idea #9: Shape Specific Clothing Stores

I like Caroline's Great Idea for stores which sort clothes to suit your hair and skin colouring. But why stop there? Let's go one further. Let's also have a store that helps you know which clothes fit your body shape. A section for (dark haired, medium skin) hourglass shapes; another for (blond, fair skin) pear shapes.

I'm also excited by the fact there is a new website on which you can buy shirts that are specifically designed to suit certain cup sizes. This is a Great Idea! i think it is particularly great for me, as I'm a D-cup- good LUCK getting a shirt to do up! Check out www.mrrose.com.au for more.

So. The Person Specific Clothing Store should stock things for certain cup sizes too. Hell, let's just go back to having tailors...

Great Idea #8: Personal Air-conditioning Controls

Wow, isn't air-conditioning great? I just love the way it can do so many fabulous things all at once: spread diseases like Legionnaire's through an entire building; emit greenhouse gases; and throw your body out of whack by plunging you into near-freezing temperatures on a 38 degree day. But really, who am I kidding? Almost no-one wants to actually EXIST in 38 degree heat, so I guess air con is here to stay, and who's REALLY complaining?

Me. I HATE freezing air-con. I don't understand the point of it, when surely it could just be set to around body temp, which I presume (complete lack of scientific background possibly obvious?) is a comfortable heat for us. But office building air conditioning is ALWAYS terrible. It's either not working, and you're sweltering, or it's freezing cold. Sometimes there are just weird patches of the building in which the air con is at a different temperature to an area five metres away.

Most office air conditioners are 'centrally controlled', so that one has no control over one's own work area. This, to me, seems ludicrous. How can we have control over our own little air con fans in cattle class airliners, but not have a little autonomy in regards to our cubicles heat regulation?

So. I propose that this be rectified soon. Oh, and air-con should use grey water. Drought, water restrictions, etc. But that's been thought of already.

Great Idea #7: Gmail Stars

I love my Gmail. It keeps track of e-mail conversations, lets me file e-mails in more than one folder, send e-mails from different e-mail addresses and even lets me talk to friends in "real time". The fact that it automatically scans my e-mails for keywords to post up related advertising doesn't bother me. For someone who likes to be as geekily organised as myself, Gmail is wonderful.

The one thing that would make Gmail PERFECT would be different coloured stars. At the moment, all the stars are yellow. This is unfortunate. I have no idea what's a volunteer-work-related star, what's a friend-catchup related star and what's an annoying-bureaucracy related star. I can't prioritise. I just know I have 25 stars that I should be doing something about, rather than blogging about... Argh! Help me, Gmail! I can't organise without you!

And if you won't do it, the idea is now out there for someone else to create an e-mail application-thing JUST LIKE GMAIL, but with coloured stars. You wouldn't want that to happen, do you?

Great Idea #6: Blonde/Redhead/Brunette Clothing Store

How many times have you gone shopping, seen something you like, but you're not quite sure if the color suits you? You could ask the sales assistant's opinion, but they will always tell you it looks fabulous.

This problem could be solved if there was a clothing store that was divided in sections of clothes that suit blondes with pale skin, another section for blondes with darker skin, another for redheads, another for brunettes with pale skin, another for brunettes with darker skin etc.

The store could even put out a catalogue using models of each hair/skin coloring combination.

Great Idea #5: Short Story Cafes

I love those cafes that have books shelved on the walls. These are normally the type of cafes that have mismatched chairs and old, over or under-stuffed couches with springs that poke into you. But that's ok- it just means you don't feel bad if you put your feet on the furniture.

Sometimes, if I'm in a cafe alone, I like to pick up a book and browse it. But realistically, one can't commit to a novel over a latte. There's just not enough reading time in a standard cup. But how can you satiate your literary hunger when you're wanting something a little more substantial than your standard trash mag fare?

Some cafes will stock zines (short, personal, handmade magazines), which is fantastic. Zines are great, because they don't demand commitment and often have interesting pictures and short quirky pieces you can read through on the fly. More cafes should have zines. And pay the zine-writers! Zinesters normally work for the love of their art.

Another often under-represented class of writer is the short-story writer, and this is where a beautiful union could occur with cafes. Cafes could commission short story writers to submit pieces, and then have them bound into short story collections to adorn the cafe shelves. Perfect cappucino froth browsing!

But a cafe needn't commit to such expense as publishing and binding. Maybe a short story could be placed on or around tables, perhaps inside the menu, framed at eye level, or slotted into a plastic menu stand. It'd give a unique, friendly vibe to the cafe, allow for stories to be on high rotation, and would mean that even when you get stuck with the crummy table in the back corner by the kitchen door, you can still delight in the personal touch of a new story to keep you company.

Great Idea #4: Cake to Share

Have you ever noticed how cake in cafes and restaurants is simply too big for one human sized person to eat alone? And of course, one is charged accordingly. Can't give away a slice of cake that could feed an entire African nation for mere small change now, could we? Just wouldn't seem right. A veritable insult to Africans everywhere.

Why is this? Sure, it's great to share a slice of cake with a friend, but what about when you can't agree on which cake to choose? Or when you're on your own? It seems quite criminal to order (and pay through the nose for) a large slice of raspberry summer torte, only to leave half of it on the oversized plate.

And so, I feel that there should be options in cake sizings. Perhaps you have a Standard Slice, reasonably priced (say, under $5) and sized for one. But then you offer the economical Share Slice, which is designed for two. Perhaps it's sized at about a Standard slice and a half, and only a few dollars more. Now the cafes will still get their profits, as people love a bargain and will often choose the share slice based on the sheer VALUE. But it means that people like me, who like to have their cake and eat ALL of it too, need not pay to leave any more than the crumbs on their dessert plates.

Great Idea #3: The Solar Panelled Laptop Computer

Is it just me, or do laptops never really work long enough to really be useful without being connected to a power source? My image of a great day with a laptop involves chilling in a park, lazily doing my job in a pleasant and non-threatening environment. Invariably, when one attempts this scenario, the laptop shuts down mid-vital-document-preparation. This shut down is generally so violent as to lose any unsaved information (in my case, most likely everything I've done, as I rarely back up my work), and perhaps, for good measure, I'll get a minor electric shock.

Now maybe I just have really bad luck with electronic devices. Perhaps I should pay more attention to the flashing "low battery" message in the corner of the screen. Perhaps I should more efficiently employ my laptop time, painstakingly word-processing, rather than googling, blogging or updating my music playlists. But hey- that's not part of my image of "An Idyllic Day Out With My Laptop".

So why don't laptops have solar panels? It makes sense! I want to use my laptop OUTSIDE, in the SUN, a source of ENERGY. You wouldn't necessarily have to solely power the computer by solar power- it could still be primarily charged by a standard power connection, but the solar panels would ensure that, while the sun revitalises your mind and melanomas, it also keeps your laptop power topped up and functional, allowing you to enjoy your playlists (er, I mean work time...) to the full.

Great Idea # 2: The Coffee Table Blog of Great Ideas

Seriously, if we don't have the time/ energy/ money/ willpower to create our own ideas, who are we kidding? We're not about to make a coffee table book!

What if we could make the whole process simpler and more immediate? Of course! The Coffee Table Blog! Enjoy the fruits of our labour, for they are few and far between.

Great Idea #1: The Coffee Table Book of Great Ideas

Have you ever had a Great Idea and thought "Someone should invent that"? And logically, being that you have had this idea, that someone inventor could well be you. But really, who has the time/ money/ energy/ willpower?

On the other hand, there definitely ARE people out there with the time/ money/ energy/ willpower; what they lack are the Great Ideas. Are the twain doomed never to meet?

No. Rather, there should be a Coffee Table Book of Great Ideas. Here, People of Great Ideas can note down their possible inventions and business ventures. This can then be perused at will by People of Time/ Money/ Energy/ Willpower. A beautiful marriage of creativity and possibility.

So here's our stab at it. Have a browse through our Great Ideas. Just remember, we're bound to recognise them again, so don't go stealing them without paying us enormous royalties!